Sometimes, I get a little overwhelmed. You know, with life…or with spanish…or with dishes or laundry or writing or working or studying or cleaning or…well…basically whatever comes my way. If there is too much of whatever facing me, I get all like…I don’t know…intimidated, and I guess I just shut down. I’m telling you this so that you can understand why I haven’t blogged in so long. It’s not because I’ve had nothing to say but because I’ve had too much to say. So. I’ve decided that it’s best to just blurt it all out at once and be done with it. Then I can get back to being totally underwhelmed and, hopefully, blogging again on a regular basis. But let’s just see what happens, okay?
May, June, and July have been absolutely ridiculously miserably crazy. Like, so disturbingly crazy that we trudged through in a daze, leaning hard into whatever needed our attention the most in a given moment, and resting only after everything was done. We moved from one house to another, we received 3 short-term teams, we helped Stephen (with more than a gentle nudge) to wrap up his Freshman year, and we walked through 1st trimester final exams with the younger boys, we adopted 2 – nope, that’s not a typo – two puppies, we bought and/or built a bunch of furniture, we sent Dyl and J-man to camp, and then, just as everything was settling down, we had our car stolen, we were extorted by crooks, and then we found our car with the help of police (who arrested the thieves but have not yet returned our car).
There. That is just about everything I had thought about blogging over the last 2 1/2 months (in an extremely condensed and super boring form). When I look at it now, it doesn’t seem like that much, but bear in mind that this all occurred in the midst of everyday life, dentist appointments, head colds, holidays, and general busyness. To tell the truth, it’s been kinda sucky. I find that the first thing I let go of when I get in over my head is my grip on God – foolish, I know. But something in me would rather thrash around frantically trying to get to the surface, than to cling effortlessly to the one thing that keeps me afloat. You’d think I would have it figured out by now. Maybe I need a remedial class on faith. I’m the “slow” kid. But thankfully, in some moment of utter exhaustion – too burnt to keep on flailing – I found myself back in the palm of His hand, taking a deep breath and blowing it all out. Alive. And…..happy.